Couples Therapy In NYC
Virtual therapy throughout New York and New Jersey
Wondering how two people who love each other can end up feeling so far apart.
This relationship used to click and now I don’t know what’s going on.
Conflict feels so repetitive and it’s like we have the same fight over and over again. It’s the same fight in different clothes. It feels like unheard even when you're both talking. One person reaching, the other pulling away. Wanting something you don't know how to say, let alone how to bring up. Getting into situations you'd be embarrassed if others found out about, even as you hold tightly to wanting this relationship to work. Wondering how two people who love each other can end up feeling so far apart.
As a holistic relationship specialist in NYC, working through an trauma informed, attachment and emotionally focused lens, I help you slow that cycle down until you can actually see it:
the fears underneath the fight
the unspoken wants
the old patterns driving how you reach for, or pull away from, each other.
Together, we build new ways of relating that feel more secure, honest, and alive.
how we might work together:
-
Relationships often shift over time, especially when partners feel misunderstood, disconnected, or overwhelmed by stress. In therapy, we explore the underlying dynamics that contribute to distance, miscommunication, or conflict around closeness.
Therapy supports couples in charged moments by:
Understanding and integrating each other’s communication and attachment styles
Enhancing emotional safety and vulnerability
Rebuilding or strengthening sexual intimacy
Developing practical strategies for reconnection
Therapy becomes a place to practice new ways of relating, rebuild trust in each other, and nurture intimacy through greater empathy and presence.
Uncover why you keep having the same fights over and over again. Learn how to break free from habitual patterns and responses. Find peace and reconciliation even when you disagree.
-
Where did the passion go? Somewhere between the routines, the responsibilities, and the years of just getting through the day-to-day, romance can quietly fade, not because the love is gone, but because there's rarely space left to actually reach for each other anymore. It looks like going through the motions of a relationship without the spark that once made it feel alive. Familiarity that's turned into distance. Wondering if this is just what long-term love is supposed to feel like, even when part of you knows it could feel like more.
This work isn't about recreating the beginning of your relationship, it's about building something deeper than that. Together, we look at what's actually gotten in the way of desire and closeness, and create space to reconnect: physically, emotionally, and as two people who chose each other and can keep choosing each other, on purpose.
Uncover what blocks the connection and how to move back into emotional connection. Therapy helps you practice new ways of relating that foster connection, intimacy, and long-term resilience.
-
Before you build a life together, it helps to actually know how you each handle conflict, closeness, and the patterns you're each bringing in, not just assume it'll work itself out once you're married. It looks like realizing you've never really talked about how you'll handle money, family, or hard days. Loving someone deeply, and still wondering if you're truly on the same page about the life you're building.
This work is a chance to build your foundation on purpose, rather than by accident. Together, we look at how you each communicate, what closeness and conflict actually look like between you, and the patterns, old and new that will shape your marriage long before the wedding day does.
Before you build a life together, it helps to understand each other's attachment styles: how you each seek closeness, handle conflict, big topics, lifestyles, and respond under stress. This is a chance to build a secure foundation on purpose, rather than by accident.
Jem Wong, LMFT
I approach couples with an understanding that people vary in their need for intimacy and closeness and that these differences can create conflict. I aim to help couples interact with an increasingly well-developed understanding of each others’ inner workings, helping transform conflict into opportunities for deeper intimacy and connection.
While working with couples, I have found that some partnerships need to heal things from their individual pasts in order to move forward in the present. I offer tools to help heal old wounds while also gaining communication skills, a better understanding of a partner’s world, and how couples can move forward together.
-
Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Gottman have studied every aspect of human relationships and discovered the secrets to being successful in love and long term partnerships. Those secrets have been transformed into the Gottman Method, readily available in all our products today. We recommend taking the time to truly master and implement these methods for a thriving relationship.
-
Attachment-based approach that helps couples identify the negative cycle they keep getting pulled into — one person reaching, the other withdrawing — and understand the deeper attachment fears driving it. Rather than focusing on the surface argument, EFT works to access and reshape the underlying emotions, so partners can respond to what's actually happening between them and build a more secure, trusting bond.
-
Couples in distress enter therapy holding two goals that they now experience as mutually exclusive: to feel loved and to feel understood. Toni Herbine-Blank’s powerful new brand of therapy, Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO), offers a comprehensive conceptual map for achieving both goals.
-
Developed by bestselling author and family therapist Terry Real, it combines psychotherapy, family systems, feminist therapy, trauma work, and neurobiology to create a highly effective method that helps even the most distant or volatile couples reconnect.
From infidelity to decades of disconnection, couples therapy is one of the most emotionally charged, high-stakes forms of therapy. RLT gets to the root of the problem quickly – often in the first session – so therapy doesn’t drag on without resolution.
-
Practical tools for managing intense emotion, tolerating distress without making it worse, and reducing anxiety in relationships and social situations.